Brutal Honesty...

As the P's little minds become more inquiring and grow more curious, their inability to filter out whats okay and not okay to say in public has gone to a whole other level. Most of the time, those little one liners that they spew off are quite funny and give us a good laugh. However, they're now becoming more insulting and make us want to crawl into a hole and die.

Insults from a toddler :

Scene 1- Thomaston, GA visiting Craig's Great Aunt Doris and Uncle Ed.
* We're all sitting around the table having lunch. As we all begin to finish up, Unlce Ed burps a few times, loudly enough for Paisley to hear it. I see her look at him and look at me and giggle. No big deal, right? Then he burps one last time and she says " Ugh, excuuuuuuse you " " You didn't say excuse me" Good thing is, she has manners, bad thing is, she has manners. Thankfully, no one else heard her say it but me!

Scene 2- Dallas, GA Waffle House
* We're sitting at a booth just finishing up our breakfast. When Presleigh all of a sudden points and says
" Eww, look at that Mommy" "Eww" I tend to tune my kids out from time to time and this was one of those times. However, out of the corner of my eye, I could see a rather large man, maybe 350lbs or so walk by and take a seat to wait on his to go order. Appearantly, this is what all the " Eww'ing " was about. Could.Have.Died. I continued to ignore her and quickly, very quickly changed the subject and made it seem as if we were discussing something else and clearly not discussing him, just in case he could hear the insults coming from our table. Presleigh had to go to the bathroom, where I took the opportunity to explain to her that we do not talk about people, it is not nice and it is very hurtful. We make our way to the car, get them strapped in and I tell Craig about what just went down-his parenting take- " Presleigh, that's not nice and that's also why you cant eat corn pups everyday" Seriously?

Scene 3- Dallas, GA QuikTrip
* After picking the kids up from the gym on date night, we decided to stop by QuickTrip so they could pick out a little treat. I get Paisley out of the carset and carry her over to the sidewalk. At that time a man walks by to get in his car where she screams " That man has sharp teeth and he looks like Nanny McPhee!" Trying not to die in laughter, I quickly snatch her up and run into the store. In her defense, he was scary. Not sure if you've seen Nanny McPhee, but she's not the poster child for oral health.We're talking about a Paulding Co country bumpkin, who spends his better days dipping Skoal and from the looks of it chews cement ( Lord forgive me ) After I gain my composure, I explain to her that what she said was not nice and very hurtful and that we must not talk about others. Meanwhile, Presleigh and Craig are still laughing away.

Scene 4- Hiram, GA Target
*I decided to get a little crazy and tackle Target alone with the girls one weekend. They were actually behaving nicely and only asking for everything in the store. They were allowed to pick out one thing each, within reason and that was it. We survived the actual trip through the store, but all of you parents know the real fun starts when you're standing in line, surrounded by candy and chocolate, and little trinkets. As we're standing in a long line the girls begin to beg for candy and chocolate. I firmly say, " You've already picked out your 1 thing, if you want candy or chocolate, you're going to have to put that back " Annoyed by that response, Presleigh loudly says " Okay, your majesty!" I died of humiliation and everyone around me died in laughter. I'm sure it was funny, for them. I was more so concerned as to whether or not these people think I require that my little subjects call me this on a daily basis or if I really was so mean and cruel, I deserved the "your majesty" remark. I'm sure when their teenagers and calling me something less tasteful, I'll be wishing it was your majesty instead. Hindsight is always 20/20 right?